A poet's advice: "does parenthood and marriage just make you too busy to care?"

A poet's advice

Welcome to A Poet’s Advice: my new monthly advice column on Substack. It’s simple. Since you asked, I’ll give you advice. The catch? I’m only responding with a poem. <3

Dear Maria,

I don’t know if this is exactly the kind of question you’re looking for (maybe it’s more of a rant), but I’m exhausted. I’m twenty-nine, and most of my friends from college have married and started having children. We talk about mortgages and diaper brands, and I’ve hosted what feels like 23 baby showers. (I think I’m happy to do this?)

They’re too busy for book club, too tired to show up at the rallies I invite them to, even though I show up for their life events. I get it, life happens. And I don’t want to sound bitter. But I can’t shake this lonely, sinking feeling that I’m the last one standing. The last girl’s girl fighting the good fight in the group. Am I just stubborn and stuck? Did I miss some secret memo about moving on? Does parenthood and marriage just make you too busy to care?

I loved the advice poem you wrote in January—it felt like a hug and a slap all at once. If it’s not too much to ask, could you write a poem for all the girls? The ones who still burn, and maybe the ones who’ve forgotten how?

Sincerely,

A girl’s girl

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Dear A girl’s girl,

Love,

Maria

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P.S. If you’d like to submit a question, please email apoetgivesadvice@gmail.com.

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